(Originally posted to Patriotforum.com August 4, 2008)
SUBFORUM: 2008 ELECTION
THREAD: I’M SO WORRIED, I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE.
-Hunter650-
-6:12 A.M.-
Every day a little piece of me dies inside.
I guess that’s an extreme way to phrase it. But living in this country, you know what I mean. The fucking degeneracy we see going on daily, that we can’t do anything about. I’ve been posting to this site for what, four years now? And nothing gets done. And now Bush’s term is almost fucking over, and he hasn’t done anything of any value for our people. So much for his campaign promises.
I mean, he’s guided us towards some good places. But I don’t see this milquetoast, John McCain, doing us any favors. Fucking moderate. Probably reads beatnik books in between his speeches on the campaign trail. I tell you, people, I am worried about this upcoming election. Because there’s more at stake here than just whoever’s sitting in the highest office in the land. What we’re dealing with here is a paradigm shift. And whether the war abroad in the Middle East is conducted with tact- whether our brothers and sons come home alive, and whether our communities remain safe from terrorism- that’s all at stake here.
I think about this too much. Nerves, all day. I drink coffee, my son tells me I should stop, but I find the only thing that can really soothe me is a cup of joe first thing every morning, and some tea right before I go to bed. Worried about so much. Whether he’ll have a roof over his head because of this fucking recession, can’t buy a home and he’s had to stay with me. He hates me, I don’t mean we just don’t get along, I mean he genuinely resents me.
These are hard times, you know what I mean. Surely you can relate. And it’s all because of this fucking climate- these fucking hippies out here, chanting about how unfair it is, how corrupt their leadership is. You know what’s unfair? Life is unfair. We’re all in this and all we can do is pick the right horse. I’ve chosen mine, and I am sticking with it to the bitter end.
Whatever the bitter end looks like.
If you have any advice to help me through this, please. Leave it below.
-VargasKeene-
-8:34 A.M.-
I know what you mean, pal. These are precarious times we find ourselves in. I’ve been lecturing my family about it, about how pretty soon it could be over. Dollar completely loses its value, drops to zero, and the Federal Reserve fails. Then Congress self-implodes, they vote in a radical figurehead to represent their corrupt agenda. I see it all happening.
And you know who that figurehead is, the patsy they’ll use to construct a fictional narrative of the new utopia that will save us from this mess. This fucking Obama guy. Came out of nowhere, gives these speeches, wins all these prizes, all these decorations. Honestly, what is this country coming to? I remember a point in time where we had values. We had a collective fabric, something to hold onto. Fucking Marxists took it all away from us. There’s no stability to culture anymore, nothing is certain. Everything is fluid, like a dream. Half the time I can’t even tell if I’m awake.
I gather the wife and kids in the living room, tell them about how if Obama is elected we’re going to move to the Caribbean, to one of those tax shelters or whatever they call them. Live off the land. Because if Obama is elected, then honestly I don’t give two shits about being an American anymore. As far as I’m concerned, his very existence in the political sphere is a sign that the end times are upon us.
My kids just stare at me and roll their eyes when I tell them that I want to protect their future. My wife reprimands them, then she’ll reprimand me, tell me that I’m being too extreme, that I should relax. I can’t say I’m going through stress on the level of what you’ve described, but I do feel for ya, buddy. Glad to see you still posting here, this is a good website for us like-minded individuals to relate to one another and find common ground. That’s rare these days.
-Hunter650-
-8:40 A.M.-
Thank you. Thank you for the reassurance. It’s good to know I’m not losing my head.
And yes, I do feel that way about Obama. Thank you for reiterating that. Guy’s a fucking nutcase. If he gets in- who knows what could happen. I foresee waves of terrorism, bombings, all over the country. Coast to coast communication disruption. They’ll infiltrate our society in disguise- try and pass themselves off as real Americans, but they can’t do it. We’ll be able to spot them. Goddamn wolves in the fold.
My heart is acting up, while I type this. I went to the doctor but he said there weren’t any medications he could prescribe besides some of those- what do you call them- opioids, I guess, for pain relief. I told him it wasn’t pain I was dealing with. It was just nerves. Like my spinal cord or something. Flaring every few seconds. There it goes again.
Not pain. Pain will only come if I have a heart attack or a stroke- I’m at the prime age for either, really, so I feel like it’s only a matter of time before something awful happens. If my son finds my dead body in this room one of these days, I hope he remembers what I told his sorry ass about the imminent decline if McCain doesn’t win, and I hope he enjoys every fucking second of it.
-Gusss-
-8:57 A.M.-
I hear you, buddy. That sounds like you’re in an awful way. I feel the same. Country is falling apart. They’re probably teaching the Quran to my daughter. She’s in Kindergarten and she already knows what the Quran is. She asked me last night over dinner about it, and I told her, “You don’t need to worry about that. Just read your Bible.” I don’t think she does, nearly as much as she should.
Anyway, in regards to your condition, I’d recommend going out for a jog. I do it every morning, it helps limber up the muscles and keeps the fluid in your joints- I forget what it’s called, exactly- it helps all that stuff function correctly. Probably it would help your heart, too. It can be nice to just get out of the house, get onto some secluded trail when the sun’s coming up and there’s still dew on the grass, reminds me of the Lord’s work in creating this green Earth, and the debt of eternal gratitude I owe him for it.
Hope it turns out good for you, you sound like a great guy and you deserve to live in a better world without all this nonsense going on.
-Hunter650-
-10:03 A.M.-
Thank you for the support.
I found out about a new group today, saw one of their signs out in public- I was waiting for the train and it arrested my attention somehow. It’s some kind of support group or something, takes place at the church one neighborhood over. Not my church, but I trust them. I’ll probably check it out next week and take the family if it’s worth anything, if it espouses useful morals or values.
It seems as if, every passing second in this country, some morals are being eroded. Fucking Liberals, they’re the cause. Probably have my wires tapped, they want to take my guns, they want to teach my children about Homosexuality, they want free abortions and prophylactics and who knows what else. I tell you, I’m really fraying at the edges here.
-Eagle0909-
-1:45 P.M.-
This is your friendly reminder from the PatriotForum staff to VOTE in this year’s upcoming election! The sanctity of our nation depends on it!
-Hunter650-
-11:34 P.M.-
I’m going to elaborate on what just happened, because even I’m not sure what I saw. I’m tired and my son is asleep, glad I didn’t bring him. I guess it was for the best that I found out what these people are like, because ultimately it goes to show what I mean about the erosion of values in our country.
I got to the front around 8, which is when the poster said they typically come together, and the church wasn’t very well-lit- I’ve passed it a few times on the way to work if there’s too much traffic on the freeway, but I didn’t realize how poorly funded it is. Probably because it’s Catholic, but I’m not in the mood to bring up that whole can of worms. I generally consider myself a Protestant, was raised with Protestant values, although my uncle was an Irish Catholic. Anyway, very obvious Catholic iconography all over the place.
I went up to the door and the guy inside poked his head out- he was younger, I think, had one square-framed glasses and a tie that hung down, and was dressed in a plain business suit, I guess- kind of like what I see Mormons wear- and he asked if I wanted in, and I told him yeah, i had seen their sign around and was looking for answers. And then, he took my hand, and guided me into the middle of the room, between the pews, and said, “Sit here, friend. Sit with the others. Here’s where you’ll find the answers you seek.” At least, I think that’s what he said.
There were around four of them, him and what appeared to be a couple, and someone in one of those hoodie things- the sweatshirts with the pull ties- sitting way back away from view. Point is, this thing was not well attended at all, and the church was very quiet, didn’t really capture sound all that well, and I was starting to feel really fuckin’ uncomfortable, with the looks the main guy seemed to be giving me. But then, he turned his attention to one of the couple.
I realized then- I kid you not- they were Goddamn Lesbians. In a church! The one I thought was a man had her hair cut real short- but I’m not stupid. These Homosexuals were openly gathering in God’s house- and for what? And I thought, “Well, I’ll just see what goes on and then leave.” But I was really burning over this, there should have been some kind of oversight in place to prevent such blasphemy.
“Come here, Sister,” said the guy in the business suit, and for a minute I think he’s some kind of fucking pervert, that he’s going to pull her shirt over her shoulders and her tits are going to flop out, or who knows what else, and I suddenly realize that maybe this is a sex cult, and the whole church has been dilapidated and taken over by this shit.
But instead, what he did was, he sat her down in front of him, and took his index fingers, and started massaging her- I don’t know what this place is called, anatomy-wise- I guess the temples. That place right on either side of the forehead where it clenches with your jaw. He started massaging her, and she made these obscene noises, these moaning sounds that built and built- shit, it was awful to listen to-
And then, her eyes opened, and they were rolled back, as if into her head, so that only the whites were showing, and a thin trail of saliva hung down offa her lips, and her mouth opened wide and suddenly I was terrified- because I tell you, I’ve never seen anything this vile in all my days on earth, anything this wrecked. She was out of it.
I don’t know what kind of twisted magic this guy was conducting, if he was doing it or if she wanted it or what, but I bolted out of there pronto and ran for my pickup truck like there was no tomorrow. Lord in heaven, I can’t imagine going back to that thing. It was awful. I had half a mind to pick up my Colt revolver out of the glove box and show them a thing or two about defiling the Lord’s name, but such alchemy has no place in our houses of worship, and goes again to show that something is seriously wrong- where I live, and where you live, and probably where everyone lives.
Keep your family indoors.
-VargasKeene-
-2:04 P.M.-
So sorry you had to go through that. Just another example of what will happen if we let this Obama guy win the Election. I bet that’s what will happen in every church nationwide from here on out, orgies and sadism and who knows what the Hell else.
You could probably report the matter to your local clergy, although if they’re Catholics, who knows if they’ll do anything. I’m a Protestant by birthright, think it runs deep in the blood of this Nation, and it’s vital we protect that by any means necessary. Might just want to avoid ever going to that one and stay at your own House of Prayer. If it’s Protestant, I’m sure it’s full of good honest people.
This is why it’s so important we secure the vote, even if McCain wins we’ll have something. I don’t think he’s evil, just ineffectual, and that’s better than being a downright degenerate as this Obama guy appears to be.
-Hunter650-
-6:45 P.M.-
You know, I’ve been doing some thinking. About all of this. I remember- I remember when that girl opened her mouth- something came out- some of it might have got on me- I don’t think it did but I’m worried. You know what they say about these people and social diseases. I might go to the doc and get tested.
I’m feeling light in the head, but it’s not a bad kind of feeling. Actually, it’s the opposite. Not sure quite how to phrase it. Like a weight has been lifted. Like all these feelings I’ve felt for so long are going. I talked to my son today and he actually seems to enjoy being around me, we threw the football for a while in the yard- I don’t know. I can’t remember the last time I was enjoying the day so much.
Still, I can’t get that image out of my head- maybe I’m just trying to forget, or avoid the inevitable. Something changed with me, something’s snapped. I need help.
-Gusss-
-11:42 P.M.-
Shit, I’m sorry, buddy. Sounds like the seasonal flu probably. It goes around quite a bit in my neck of the woods. Not sure if you can catch anything forms someone if they’re sitting a ways apart from you, as you seem to indicate she was- but I wouldn’t necessarily give those sorts of people the benefit of the doubt.
-Hunter650-
-10:12 A.M.-
I can’t explain it. I just can’t-
I woke up this morning, much earlier than usual, started drawing on paper- I’ve never drawn before, never had any kind of artistic knack. These symbols get thrown out, circles and squares and shit, my hand frantically going over the paper, again and again, and in an hour I had forty of these pages of nonsense scattered around. All unholy looking shit, all vile, horrible scenes of eating and looking and dying- I don’t want to think about these things, but it’s dawned on me-
And it’s like, I see it now. I see how it is. Election. Nobody should care about the election, won’t change anything. Hegemony. This word keeps flashing, hegemony, always hegemony. Don’t know what the word means, looked it up and it refers to a kind of dominance- I always used to think I was dominant, had things under control, but there is no more control, no more control by anyone over me or by me over anyone. And this is bad.
You think you see what matters until it all gets flipped and you’re out of your head, all the world rushes at you- God, I’m out of my head now- out of my head- hee hee- not in a good place, not in anyplace, just out in the open, out towards the sun, the sun sees it, Antares and the further things, and the green and the blue and the violet, all colors, all receding toward The Eye-
-VargasKeene-
-4:45 P.M.-
You, uh- you okay?
-Eagle0909-
-1:45 P.M.-
This is your friendly reminder from the PatriotForum staff to VOTE in this year’s upcoming election! The sanctity of our nation depends on it!